Love??? What is love???

What is the use of love without having someone to love ? When that special someone just takes your heart as a piece of shite, and flushes it away from her life.
She didn't cared , she just did it in the most painful way, making up excuses, trying to get out of the issue, difficult thing if you don't talk with your heart , she didn't ,she just asked to stop seeing her, stop looking for her, she asked to forget her...
It is not as simple as it sounds, forgetting means burning the past experiences, what makes you grow, forgetting is a simple word, but it hides many feelings, hate,love, respect, fear, just to mention some.
I look into my past and I barely see what or whom I used to be, I do know I lied to many persons , those persons who believed in me the most, I know I failed to them, I am still hoping to get another chance to be trusted, I won't have as long as she doesn't wants to, but I know in her heart the ashes are still burning, and will burn for the time she lives.
I still don't know what is love, loving someone ore being loved, still every time I find different feeling about someone I blind myself calling it love.
The power of the words is too great, and I don't know how to handle it.
I play with them as if they were marbles, as if they were rocks. Throwing them without caring who I may hurt.
I'll keep playing , I'll keep taking the risk , until the moment I find ............. Not just the girl , but also what love is....



I usually write with something or someone in mind , but the past few days life has taught me one of the most difficult lessons, and I failed the test several times, I haven't passed it yet, it keeps flying through my mind, not just what she said, but also the past. Too many things in very little time, most bad, a few of them good , and one or two that marked my life.
Ragazza it's of what you said that made me touch the bottom, now I need to find my way out.