She doesnt exist anymore

She doesn't exist any more,
She doesn't exist any more.
I let her go like the fool that I was,
thought I'd get over her soon.
I smell her perfume when my eyes are closed,

and I see her face in the moon.

She doesn't exist any more,

She doesn't exist any more.

I tell myself it would be different now,

I wouldn't treat her that way.
I wouldn't be me if she wasn't her,
and it's far too late, anyway.
'Cause she doesn't exist any more,
She doesn't exist any more.
Only inside the ghost of the love,
that is wordless and painful and old.
There's no one else in the whole outside world,

that matches to her soul.
But she doesn't exist any more,
She doesn't exist any more.


Bar Requiem

En el bar de tu cara,

las noticias no importan,

el clima pasa por los cojones,

varias onzas de whisky,

un poco de soda,

y el reloj de pared,

puede irse con su péndulo,

a registrarse bajo el nombre de su madre

al infierno...


Nebula nocte

It has been a dark and foggy nite
Being I'm your's and you're mine
Holding your hand I been facing this life
On days that looked like a nitemare from my eyes.

I hold your heart tight to mine
This feeling of emtpiness has started to collide
I understand that distance has changed our ways
Your shadow blurring back a strange

I can't even feel you no more
I'm here my love to you remain
How can I make you stay with me
Of me, you're not happy anymore

So I think of us countless times
Ocean of tears falling in my eyes
Day and nite I wish to fight
My love for you rain or shine
If I thought I'll change your mind

But our dreams I'll hide and save inside
I'll cherish them like a precious star
Perhaps, it'll help if you stay one more nite
and let my heart cherish your heart.



Your eyes hide under the sheets,
covered in lust, tears and dreams.
I take off my pride,
leave it right next to my pants.

My sin keeps growing,
in this distance, there is no place to hide.
Your sight gets lost in memories,
memoirs you seem not understand.

It is time to reveal my mind,
find a place for my broken heart,
taking a step closer to the edge,
your heart and body are so far away.

Should I let myself fall apart,
wait for your heart to make up its mind,
it is this love that brings me back
To a bed that is empty tonite.



One espresso shot,
half past five,
pop two naproxen pills,
wash them down with redbull,
light up my pipe,
picture your smile in my mind,
its worthless.....

One espresso more,
half past nine,
a tear rolls down my eyes,
the taste of tobacco
bitters in my mouth.
Your memory vanishes with the smoke.......

One last espresso,
twelve forty five,
the moon wont shine tonight.
Light up one more time,
the tobacco turns into ashes
after a quick fire.
Just like my heart.....


Coração de caipirinha

Después de embriagar mi corazón

de caricias y besos eternos,

entre fantasías e ilusiones,

he caído presa de tus mentiras.

Te escucho a lo lejos,

el sonido inconfundible de tus pasos,

el ambiente perfumado de tu piel

embriaga mis sentidos….

Sumerge mis sueños en tu pasión,

Olvida el tiempo pasado

Aquel que te ha lastimado

Sumerge mi vida en tu corazón.

Ofuscado por tus besos

Que tan solo han dejado un sabor amargo

Vuelvo a recordar que solo han sido mentiras,

Mentiras e ilusiones, vuélveme a embriagar.



Lost Day

- Are you sure?

- Yes, no doubt about it.

- Did you asked Alex about it ?

- Indeed, and nothing.

- How bout Diego?

- Same story.

- Don't you have classes that day?

- I talked to Mrs. Sobin and she has no record about it.

- Mhhh … don't worry, you'll remember the moment you least expect it …. You'll see.

- Sure… we'll talk later.

- Don't worry everything will be fine.

- I hope so…. Ciao.

- Bye

Maybe a note or a poem I wrote that day…

I check every notebook and loose paper I find… the desk... The counter…


Maybe in my pockets… As I go through every pair of jeans looking for an answer I get the same answer.


Dirty clothes are still scattered all around my bedroom, and the dirty dishes show that no one has eaten anything in the past few days.

I count my cigars….A Partagas, the Cohiba Diego gave me, and an old Sancho…. This only means there has been no parties and my friends have not been in the apartment lately.

The dog is lying next to his bowls which are empty and dry meaning its been a while since last I fed him.

The car is still in the same spot I usually park it so it gives me the same answer.


My mail is full, but there is no mail from that day, there are no calls placed or received in my cell phone, and I check my email and there is nothing new.

I'm tired….

There are no signs of it.

I have lost another day.



Lo supe demasiado tarde ,
mi mente vagaba sin descanso.
Callejones y calles iluminadas;
No encuentro el porque .
Mi corazon ya no pregunta mas.
Duele tu ausencia
Y ese orgullo intransigente
Que no te permite volver.
Una herida mas ,
Aniquilando sentimientos,
Enterrando palabras,
En poemas ajenos ,
Olvidando el roce de tu pie,l
Arrastrando miseria ,
Palabras acordes
A circumstancias erroneas,
Sentimientos diluidos
en abrazos fortuitos .
Sigo esperando;
Pregunta sin respuesta….
Llamaras o seguire anorando tu ausencia..


Poem without poet.

Im not a poet,
just an aching heart,
looking for some comfort
and an honest smile.
I'm not Shakespeare
neither Bukowski,
but this is my last pain
there won't be any more poems.
It's simply easier.
Quiet my crazy feelings,
kill the root of all;
I'm lost... It's dark....
Endless words
that never rhyme.
No more poems,
no more endless nites.
She took away what created this stupid verse
and crushed my stone cold heart.


Bar Memento II

- What a surprise I never thought finding you here and certainly I've been looking everywhere.

- Really? I don't believe you, I have been here and there.

- I've left you messages everywhere, enough for you to know where to go at the right time to make it seem like a casual encounter.

-Like now?

- This doesn't count it's just a dream and tomorrow I wont remember it anymore, besides I forgot my camera to take a picture and remember it the rest of my life.

- The light is very dim; your picture wouldn't come out alright.

-It's just a dream of course it would come alright. I would dream it's the perfect picture.

- Then dream that you have your camera and shoot. I promise I won't close my eyes.

- I can't, it would be better if I write it in my hand and tomorrow morning I put it on a Post-it.

- And what are you going to write?

-That I must not forget what I dreamed about.

The place is small, black walls, velvet curtains. It must be a basement. Short wooden tables with a candle in the middle, lightening everyone who's sitting around. Little instruments fixed in a giant scenario. Drums, sax, and guitar; all aligned right next to a black piano where old pianists used to play and leave a suitcase covered in stickers from the places they have been . Two more candles light up the rest of the place, everyone around are sipping a drink while they wait for the next group to finish setting up their equipment.


- This is a noir bar

-I know, I guess that's why I was able to find you here. .

- Of course

- And do you come often?

- No, you only come here when you lose someone. This bar is to accept your lost..

- So you cry and drink?

- No. Whoever comes here knows that losing someone is natural so they come here to have a good time, besides the jazz group s one of the best around.

- But why if there are a lot of people no one socializes and tries to hook up with each other

- Because thats not the purpose of the bar. You just come here to be by yourself

- So you mourn for your loss by having a good time?

- Aja.

- And how long it takes?

- Two or three songs, it all depends on how long the relation lasted. .

- How many songs it took you to forget me?

- Two.

In silence two artists go up the stage, each one takes their instruments and starts checking it for any imperfection. The cigarette vendor walks through our table, as I stop her I give her my pipe so she can fill it with the best tobacco she carries. To the beat of some jazz the vendor walks away with my hard earned money. No one sings yet it seems everybody knows the lyrics. There is no microphone yet you can listen to a singer.

-Hows your mom?

- I dreamed about her before coming, we were shopping for something.. I dont know exactly what maybe Christmas presents.

- And Daniel?

- I havent seen him in a while We met at a place like this except the walls were blue and they only served tequila and Marlboro lights we laughed a lot. See I didnt forget about it because I wrote it in my hand.

- Say hello to them when you see them again, I think of them quite often.

- Ill write it down in my arm, Ill also write to keep sending you messages.

- But make them easier to understand.

- You should know what Im talking about, we dated for over a year.

-I know what you are talking about, but Im afraid I might be mistaken.

-If you doubt then it means that you were not born to be with me.

For the third song; a fat lady starts walking towards the stage, she starts cleaning up for the next band, as she brooms from the side of the stage a guy with a cigarette in his hand walks towards the microphone, the fat lady walks away, as he sits down he throws away the butt of the cigarette and the music starts , there are no musicians or else in the place.

Midnight on a beach on the Mediterranean

and I miss you,

even here taking it all in.

The sand, silvered, carries the moon

on it's shoulders.

Is it possible to put this night to tune

and move it to you?

On the table next to us a guy with a red striped tie is keeping the beat with his foot; he discovers that Im watching and as he blinks to me he sends with the waitress a pink Post-It - For your room, so you never forget He is still drinking and keeping the beat.

- They are really good, the singer is incredible and the song is amazing.

- Yeah, it has a lot of feeling.

- Its a really good mood, everyone here is happy; it seems that instead of mourning they are celebrating something.

- In some way they are celebrating that they will be able to start all over again.

- What time they close?

- You see the TV that is in the corner?

- Yes

- When a black line starts blinking it means its time to go.

- And at what time that is going to happen.

- I dont know.

- Well then how long will it take to appear?

- I dont know either; I just know that when it happens we have to go.

- So there is no time? Minutes, hours, days?

- No; what for? Everybody knows how it works , when it blinks you just go.

Dont cry, I'll bring this home to you

If I can make this night light enough to move.

-Its been two years now.

- I know.

- Its a long time

- Indeed

- It was so fast I didnt even noticed its been two years already.

- We have been busy.

- Thats a sad answer; I cant believe what you are saying.

- It would be even worse to say something else

- Two years.

- Ajám.

- Two year s and I still love you like if we just barely hung up on the phone.

Cargo ships move by

tracing on the horizon line.

There's a luster from the city lights

on the waves that kiss our feet

and we're thinking of going in,

the time's getting thin.

-Did you see?

- What?

- The line started blinking we need to go.

- But the song is not over yet.

- We need to go, thats the rule.

- Alright. I hope this is not the last time we meet.

- I hope not, well we better say good-bye here, they must not see us leave together.

- Why?

- Because thats the rule. You come here alone and you leave the same way.

- Ok dont forget your rose.

-Thanks Im glad we met here. Somewhere else might have been impossible.

-I guess well until next time.

- Take care.

- You too and thanks.

- Why thanks?

- For letting me love you once more through you eyes.

This is a city for not sleeping

and the clocks are set by feel.

At this moment from where I sit,

none of it seems real.